it's about 3am in korea, and i am having some trouble falling asleep tonight.  (perhaps i got it from hooch...aww. hooch, not able to sleep is no fun )

i'm supposed to meet up with my brother at 10am which means that i have to leave the house by 9:30 (the latest) which, again, means that i should get up by 8am...5 hours from now. wonder if i will be able to fall asleep in next five hours. hmm

a stream of random thoughts, memories, and so on...

i'm missing the good old times that i had like crazy tonight...endless talk, late night trips to eat n' park, bagels, movies, library, all nighter at katz, clubs, margaritas, and more...

thank god to the technology that we have today, i can still talk to my friends and stay in touch with them, but every so often, i can't help but feeling so alone...wish i had my friends around me.

as you get older, it seems much harder to meet and find new true friends...because you start seeing people with your head, not with your heart...often calculation comes before anything else when it comes to personal relationships...

aww. i don't know. sometimes, even the simplest thing can become the most complicated matter.

i should really get some sleep...yeah. i should.

good night

Currently Listening Big Girls Don't Cry By Fergie see related

quite often, i really want to install hidden cameras all over my house...just so that i can take a peak at what my puppy does when no one is around...because, i swear. i think he turns into a human and does humanly things when nobody is around.

for example (among hundreds of others), my puppy managed to self-teach how to take medicine out of its original wrapper...i had some anti-acid stomach medicine thingy around today (cuz i went through a rough time of puking my guts out yesterday...), and i accidently left them on a small side table next to the couch which can easily be reached by my puppy. few hours of shopping later, i found all of my medicine to be out of its origial foil-like, tightly sealed wrappers...thank god that he didn't swallow any, but...how did he do it tho???

but then, later this evening, my puppy found ways to peel off labels from travel-size shampoo/conditioner/bodywash bottles...my little pouch full of travel-size bottled shampoo/conditioner/bodywash (so i can carry them around easily with me when i go workout...since that place has a nice showering facility ) was taken out of my gym bag, and all of my travel-sized bottles became label-less.  can you imagine a miniature dog (maltise), sitting on a couch, peeling off labels from travel-size bottles?  i can't really, but apparently, my dog can do it. and he did it quite well.

so, as for the punishment, i stuck all the labels, that my puppy peeled off, on his body.  the labels are not really sticky anymore, but just enough to stay on his body barely for the night...

who wants to donate some cameras so that i can install them around in my house to watch my dog?

I'm Back!!

so i think i'm gonna try to be on xanga again.

it's july 1st here in korea already, and i suddenly realized that i am doing nothing but wasting my precious time here. i was brushing my teeth couple nights ago and had a sudden thought.

what if someone were to randomly come up to me and ask, 'what have you done with your life'....?

and when i got to that question, i couldn't think of an answer. not that i didn't do anything for last 22 years and a half, but some parts of my life seem to be falling apart lately. some in good ways, and some in bad ways. after 7 weeks of being at home, i currently find myself to be in a lot of odd situations. someone that i thought would stay the same way forever was already long gone, moving ahead and finding a life of his own again...and pathetically, i haven't been able to pull myself away from negative thoughts. contradicting myself. i know. i thought i was a little more grown up, but i guess i really am not. i am just a big baby still. i don't seem to be good at facing the reality and i also don't seem to have a good adaptation skill when put to a new situation. i know. it's quite bad. really baaaad.

it's quite hard to figure out what's going through my head lately. things get tangled pretty bad up there. and with my precious friend all being so far away from me, boredom and loneliness can get quite rough sometimes. haha. now i just sound like a tool .

well, the point here is that i am trying to give myself another chance. giving myself some time to self-develop...going to gym, learning how to drive, learning how to understand others in another language besides korean or english, learning myself, learning how to face the reality. things will get hectic again in september, so hopefully i can get something out in next two months or so. hopefully, i can smile a little better by then....

because...like everyone says, time does heal everything...no matter what that might be.

Currently Watching Something the Lord Made see related

so yeah...i just read what i wrote like two or three weeks ago, and..

I just realized nothing has changed. I mean, it's already June and I am still saying what has happened to all those days, and I am still not getting anything done. Darn.

Well, today is my last day at the tutoring job for the summer, and then I have two weeks or so before I start my RTA position for 5 weeks so I better get some of my things done.

Oh, and this movie was really good. I think I'm gonna try to read a book by Dr. Thomas at some point as well. It should be interesting.